


My Best Friend's Wedding Date

by writingramblr



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Cliche, Escort Service, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Love at First Sight, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-11 14:36:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5629981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingramblr/pseuds/writingramblr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rey refuses to show up to her best friend Finn's wedding without a date, so with one day to spare, she goes on the lookout for a temporary companion. The only answer is naturally, a male escort.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> naturally, tropes and cliches apply, and none of this is based in fact, all is inspired by movies, and was ridiculously fun to write.

Rey Kenobi knew it was a horrible idea, but she was desperate. She couldn’t show up for her best friend’s wedding without a date, and her family was getting more and more relentless about hounding her for her singleness and lamenting their lack of grandchildren.

It was time to take action.

If only temporarily.

So she turned to the last place on earth one should use to find a date.

The internet.

Worse still, she went looking for a companion for hire.

She didn’t actually want to find and date and take someone home.

There wasn’t time for all that anyway, and besides, no real love or sexual even, interesting party would be meeting her family…like, ever.

The longer she sat at her makeshift desk and scrolled, the more her shoulders tensed and her back hurt and her jaw dropped at the rising prices.

Forget seeking someone for great, or even good, sex. Finding someone just for an afternoon was over a hundred dollars!

Rey sucked in her breath and hovered over a profile that had to be a total joke.

He wasn’t cheap, but he sounded fairly close to perfect.

‘I’m tall, handsome, quick witted, slow to annoyance, and your parents will love me when I talk about my passion for the environment. I also can stand to be around small children, as long as they aren’t yelling and running and screaming. I’ll still be taller than you in your tallest heels, trust me, and my smile can melt even the bitchiest of aunts. Beyond hand holding and hugs, physical stuff is negotiable. Go on, send me a message. If you’re not a fucking idiot or crazy, this could work.’

His picture was just teetering on the border of ridiculous. He was handsome, as he said, but in a very unconventional way. In fact, Rey would probably never have looked twice at him on the street, heading the opposite direction, but the longer she stared at his half dozen profile photos, she found herself warming slightly to the idea of being on his arm, even if only platonically, for a shit ton of money she could probably spend on her car repairs.

Wrecks were so not cheap and the paperwork was enough to make her have dark thoughts about the crash in general.

Back to the hottie for hire.

He had a long face, with sharp angles on his cheekbones and his nose was kind of oversized, but not in a bad way. His long dark hair swooped over his forehead in a just fucked someone way, and Rey decided she liked it.

She even wondered what his sex hair would really look like, but then again, that would be extra.

In one of his pictures he was holding what looked like a fake light up sword, and the smolder he gave the camera, or whoever was behind it, could probably be marketed as a deadly weapon.

He managed to look sexy as he held a toy.

How did he do that?

Rey clicked the blue contact button and sat looking at the big empty white box, with a blinking cursor for nearly an hour before just getting up and walking around the room.

Sitting down once more, she exhaled slowly, there wasn’t to beat around the bush.

Either he’d say yes, or he was busy that weekend.

Steeling herself, she began to type.

*

Ben Solo was very amused at the request he received, to be a wedding escort, well, not quite that, for a young woman who was returning home for the first time in half a decade, her words, and the fact she’d called him arm candy was just on the side of adorable and not condescending.

She’d meant every word.

Her email was practically dripping with sincerity, so he’d been unable to ignore it.

After all, when some pretty young thing was paying the way, he’d attend a wedding in the desert.

Not that Arizona wasn’t that far off.

Compared to New York, it was basically a desert.

He pointed out that fact to her the second he sat down on the plane next to her.

She’d been extremely unsubtle about checking him out when he strolled up to the gate, ticket in one hand, suitcase handle clutched in the other.

He’d pulled out all the stops, as he’d been informed the instant they landed they were going to be attending the dress rehearsal, so he’d put on his best black suit, and shiny leather shoes.

He knew most times his pictures didn’t do him justice, but it still gave him little fuzzies inside when he’d seen her face pink as she took him in.

The funniest part was how he _towered_ over her, and she was in small wedge sandals. Technically two inches worth of height, but no matter, when she was a foot shorter than him flat footed.

He grinned down at her, and waited for her to stop gawking.

“Shall we?”

He gestured broadly to the doorway, where the friendly woman in red and blue was standing, waiting to check their tickets, and she gulped, blinked and then seemed to return to herself.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

Now, sitting beside her, somewhat crammed into the coach seats, he wondered what was going through her mind. Obviously she was a virgin to the whole ‘escort’ thing, and though she’d asked a ton of questions in her intro email, there had been one glaring omission.

She hadn’t probed the idea of sex.

Not one bit.

She’d mentioned physical contact would be important, and outlined with extreme detail how she liked to be hugged, and held and if her hands were to be taken, the fingers would be laced, yadda yadda ya.

He almost brought it up once the plane took off, so she’d have no decent escape, but then decided against it.

She fell asleep almost instantly, and he wondered just how much she’d been stressing out about the whole thing.

A lot it seemed.

He didn’t push it, but when she fell asleep on his shoulder, shifting while in dreams, he had half a mind to tell her that sort of contact wasn’t discussed.

He smiled to himself, and went back to reading the Skymall catalogue.

*

“Rey, darling, who is this?”

Gritting one’s teeth was the only way to survive speaking to Maz Kanata, Finn’s eccentric aunt who seemed to only be able to speak in tongues, philosophical ramblings that made Rey feel about three years old.

“This is Ben, he’s my…”

Shit. She hadn’t planned on what to call him, but luckily he swooped in, taking Maz’s hand in his, bringing it to his mouth to graze a ghost of a kiss over her knuckles, and in turn, Rey’s heart seemed to skip a beat.

How did he make that look so sexy?

“Date and possible mate for the duration of our stay.”

He threw her an exaggerated wink, and she could have choked on her drink, if it hadn’t been sweating uselessly in her hand.

Maz tittered, and then delicately yanked her hand back, before looking right at Rey,

“You seem perfectly matched. Benjamin. Has she told you how beautiful your eyes are? They look like carved onyx spheres.”

Ben’s eyebrows twitched and he smiled, recovering easily.

“Thank you. I’ve never heard that before. Rey doesn’t really have the whole, sweet nothings down yet.”

Another wink, and there was no way everyone in a two person radius hadn’t seen that one.

Rey thought she could happily die, if the ground would open up and swallow her. The night was not going as planned.

Before she could pull Ben aside and hiss at him in annoyance, she caught sight of the groom and groom out of the corner of her eye.

“Poe!”

She called out, relieved to have a distraction, and a handsome one at that.

“My little Rey of sunshine!”

Ben had had an arm around her waist, slightly curved, but not firm, and Poe’s hug lifted her away and off her feet, before dropping her gently back down, and she found herself in between Finn and his fiancé.

“You promised not to call me that.” Rey mumbled in protest, grinning despite herself.

Finn punched Poe on the shoulder,

“She’s right man. You remember that night?”

Poe laughed, tossing his head back, and perfectly mussing his curls just so.

No wonder Finn had been so quickly besotted, Poe was the personification of a shampoo commercial, if they had any depth, love of flying and thai food.

When Finn had first introduced Rey to Poe, she’d been almost afraid to believe he was real, really sincere, really a nice guy, and really in love with her best friend.

For the last year, she’d been very glad to find herself proven wrong.

“I could hardly forget the first time you said you loved me.”

Poe added, and suddenly Rey felt as if she was standing on the edge of a canyon, facing the jump or being pushed.

Finn was beginning a whole new portion of his life, with someone he loved, and who loved him, and here she was, standing stock still in a dress a shade too tight and too dark, at the dress rehearsal with a man who she was paying to be with her.

What had she done?

*

Ben could see Rey freezing up, and the familiar signs of social anxiety were starting, so he stepped smoothly between the groom and her best friend, sliding his arm back in place around her back, and smiling warmly.

“Aren’t you going to introduce me Rey?”

He looked down at her, willing her to relax, and know that it would be okay.

She blinked, once, twice, and then her smile blossomed,

“Yes of course. Guys, this is Ben.”

Both men shook his hand one after the other, and he could already sense they were mentally preparing the ‘scare him straight’ speech for their best friends supposed significant other, ish.

He let it roll off his back like water on a duck, and continued the conversation easily until there was a dinging of metal on glass, signaling time for a speech.

The men moved away, to join the woman speaking, who had to be Finn’s mother, judging by the shared features; square jaw, warm eyes, and bright smile.

Rey hid her face as a story about her and Finn from when they were younger began, and he was rather surprised when she chose to do so towards him, tucking her head under his chin and between his neck and shoulder.

He pulled her close, and did his best to comfort her without knowing why.

Once the party died down a bit, and they headed for her childhood home, him driving and her directing, she started talking.

“My parents are a bit odd. Just so you know. They couldn’t make the rehearsal tonight because dad had to work. Well, my stepfather, technically. My mom remarried when I was just a kid. My real dad died when I was pretty little.”

Ben nodded.

“I see. So that explains your daddy issues.”

Rey gaped over at him, and he couldn’t resist a chuckle.

“I’m just trying to lighten the mood Rey. You’ve been on edge since we left that place. Since the plane took off, but you hid in your sleep.”

He glanced over at her, and was surprised at the fire he caught in her gaze.

She was _angry_ with him.

“Don’t do that. I’m not paying you to antagonize me.”

Ben suddenly sobered. She was right. There was still a matter of that. Payment.

She’d covered the plane ticket and rental car, but that was a fraction of his price.

“This is it.”

She spoke suddenly, yanking him from his thoughts, and he carefully parked the car before moving to open her door and assist with her bags. Never let it be said that Ben Solo didn’t know how to get in the good graces of women he was with.

“Rey! Darling. Welcome home. Sorry we couldn’t come to see sweet Finn. But just think, it’ll all be a surprise for us.”

Rey’s mother was gorgeous, and Ben couldn’t help the stare he gave her, before he collected himself and smiled his typical, ‘meet the parents’ expression.

She was a thin woman with delicate features, and though her hair was streaked with silver and her smile lines were pronounced, he could see Rey’s cheekbones and her eyes shining back at him.

“I’m Sabe Kenobi. And you are the mystery man I’ve heard so little about.”

Ben looked over at Rey and received a shrug of her shoulders for his answer.

“Yep, that’s me.”

“Come in, come in.”

Once Rey’s father had introduced himself as well, he a stately and quiet man, with a grey streaked blond beard and mustache set, along with icy green eyes, Ben followed Rey upstairs, prepared to drop off her luggage and then seek out his room.

“Uh…”

She stopped in the middle of the hallway, and her hands wrung together.

“What’s wrong?”

She glanced back at him with something like fear in her eyes.

“Uh, there’s only one guest room. They turned my room into an office, and though usually they wouldn’t approve, due to the last minute things…you being here, we’ll need to share.”

It wasn’t the end of the world, but Ben got the sense that Rey hadn’t been expecting it.

“What do you mean they wouldn’t approve? You’re an adult aren’t you?”

He smirked at her, moving to set the bags in the corner of the room she’d slowly led them to, and she winced slightly.

“Yes but, only in recent years have they seemed to figure that out. Along with alcohol, my mom and step dad have re-discovered their youth with recreational drugs. Soft ones, but still.”

“Ah. So they’re stoners and alcoholics, but they’re chill about it all.”

Rey waved a hand around,

“Ish.”

The room itself wasn’t too crowded, and almost looked as if it once had held two beds, but they’d been replaced in favor of one king.

“Do you want the bathroom first, or shall I?”

Ben probed cautiously, after all, it was her house.

Rey was wringing her hands together again,

“Uh…”

“I can go first if you need a minute. I won’t be long.”

She nodded, and then walked over to her suitcase, slowly and methodically beginning to unpack.

He took that as a sign she was giving him space.

He shrugged, shucking off his jacket, gently setting it over the desk chair in front of a table that overlooked what was probably a back garden, and he heard a sharp intake of breath.

“What are you doing?”

His hands froze on his shirt, halfway unbuttoned,

“Getting undressed to shower?” He offered.

She looked wide eyed, as if she had been watching him, and not really unpacking.

She was sneaky.

He liked it.

Too much.

“Out here?”

Her voice broke in a squeak.

Something inside his chest clenched, and in a desperate move, he spoke again.

“If you pay me now, would you feel better?”

*

The broad expanse of pale chest that was on the verge of being exposed was making Rey a bit weak in the knees.

Then he brought up the money, and her blood ran cold.

Her fingers had brushed over it when she’d first unsnapped her suitcase latches, and she’d wondered if it had been the best idea to pack it below her underwear.

It was kind of ironic.

“Yes.”

She hadn’t meant to snap, but he was throwing her way off her game, and there was absolutely zero game in her in the first place.

She didn’t need game, he was being _paid_ to like being around her.

She just hadn’t counted on having to watch him undress, go shower, and then get into bed with her.

“Here.”

The envelope was heavy and it nearly hurt to hand over so much money. A decent chunk of her savings was going into what would likely be the shortest weekend of her life.

“It’s all there. Count it.”

Ben took it, and his fingers brushed against the back of her hand, making her traitorous heart jump and skitter in her chest,

“I trust you.”

Rey gritted her teeth,

“ _Count_ it.”

Ben smiled, standing in front of her, shirt hanging half open, with skin practically calling out to be touched, and he shrugged,

“Yes ma’am.”

He flicked the envelope open and brought a hand to his mouth, pressing the pad of his thumb between his lips, and she saw his tongue poke out and wet it, before returning to the wad of bills, and he did as she asked.

She went over to the bed and took a seat. It was safer.

When he finished, he looked over at her, and his smile looked a little tight.

“It’s exactly right. I thought so.”

He set the envelope down on his open suitcase, and after grabbing what looked like a pair of boxers, beelined for the bathroom.

The door closed firmly with a click behind him, and Rey was left sitting on the bed, staring after him.

He almost seemed angry. As if she’d done something wrong. She’d paid him in full. Was she supposed to only do half now and half later?

He’d never mentioned that.

The bathroom door opened a crack, and Ben’s head poked out, drawing Rey’s gaze.

Through the few inches of space it allowed, she could see miles of naked skin, and the door just barely hid his probably gorgeous business from her sight.

“For the record, this is not going to go well if you don’t trust me, like I trust you.”

Something like disappointment was coloring his eyes, making them gleam at her, and she sat, speechless, as the door closed again with a snap.

It wasn’t more than five minutes later that she heard Ben moving around the bathroom, out of the shower, and then a mere thirty seconds later, he emerged with damp hair, curling around his face, and clad only in black boxers, as she’d suspected.

She gulped.

“Your turn.” He said smoothly, and with a grand gesture, she realized he was telling her to go and wash off the airplane and stress of the last few hours.

Gratefully, she retreated into the warm and humid room he’d vacated.

It wasn’t until she’d jumped into the shower, sighed in relief under the hot water, then tensed immediately, realizing she’d not brought any pajamas or anything inside with her.

All she had was a towel.

“Fuck.”

She said to the tile flooring, annoyed at herself and the world in general.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since Rey looks so much like Kiera Knightley, i thought, why not run with that? obviously its not canon, but this is just for fun.


	2. Chapter 2

Ben was sitting up in the bed, scrolling through the newsfeed of his facebook when he finally heard the bathroom door open.

Rey had been in there nearly half an hour and he wondered if she was all right. He’d nearly gone in after her, just a bit concerned she might have tried to drown herself in the shower, if that hadn’t been completely the worst idea ever.

It turned out the reason she’d been hiding was simply that, she was hiding from him.

Also the fact was she only wore a towel.

 Immediately his libido came roaring to life, and he regretted not bringing up the idea of sex when they’d both been clothed and things were slightly less awkward.

“Sorry. I went in there unprepared.”

She apologized a lot for things she didn’t need to.

“It’s okay. I did wonder what you were doing.”

Her skin was already flushed from the heat of the water, but then again, depending on how long she’d been out, maybe it wasn’t just that, still, she was blushing.

“I was trying to build up the courage to come out like this. So yeah…”

Her knuckles were white, clutching the towel around her, and he didn’t understand why. From what he could see, her body was perfectly worth being looked at. Wiry muscle on her arms, led to soft curves down her waist, and her legs were nicely toned. She clearly took care of herself.

“No worries. Take your time. But don’t be surprised if I’m asleep when you finally come to bed.”

She blushed harder, and his heart gave a little flip flop.

What the fuck was that?

“About that…”

Oh no. She was going to talk about sex now, in nothing but that scrap of cotton and he in just his boxers.

Oh, this was bad.

“Yeah?”

Nonchalance. That was it. ‘Act indifferent.’ He thought.

“How does that work? Do you do just…sleeping? Sleeping with, without…sex?”

He grinned, and nodded, as if it was the easiest question in the world,

“Of course. Anything beyond what we’ve put in writing is…”

“Out of the question.”

She breathed out, halting his thought mid sentence.

“…Wait, what?”

He couldn’t help it. He needed clarification.

Rey seemed to tug the towel even tighter about her body, if that was possible.

“I don’t think I can do that. Pay you for sex, I mean. I wouldn’t feel right.”

Ben felt something inside him crawl up his throat, threatening to choke him.

It was ugly, and feral, and he wanted to die in that moment.

“I’m here, in your bed, and you’ve already paid me to just ‘be your date,’ how much worse could it be?”

He was utterly casual, and matter of fact, so much that it felt like he was scraping himself raw, but she was annoying him, somehow, getting right up under his skin.

She wasn’t trying to be cruel, but he felt _insulted_.

“Well, not worse, but certainly…oh god, this is so weird.”

She abandoned the death grip on the towel to put her head in a hand, and Ben took the chance, getting smoothly out of the bed, and making his way to her side.

When she looked back up, and found him only a handful of inches away, he relished the little jump she made and the widening of her eyes.

“Rey…it’s only weird because you _think_ it is. Ask me for something…anything, and I’ll do it.”

He lowered the tone of his voice, and he saw the way her eyes dropped to his lips.

Not quite the specialty of his, but he’d once been told he could drop the panties of a woman at three paces.

She was already naked, so it wasn’t exactly a challenge in that sense.

Getting her to relax and admit she needed more than arm candy and simply a warm body at her beck and call would be the hard part.

“I, uh…”

Rey began, and her hands met at once, in front of her chest, fingers tangling, and Ben stepped closer, watching her echo his movement, backing up, until her back met the bathroom door, and she was stuck.

“Yes?”

He brought his hand over to graze her bare arm, in the most innocent of touches, and he felt goosebumps erupt on her skin, as her breathing sped up.

His head was already leaning down as hers tilted up, her hands stilling between them,

“Maybe just a kiss…”

He licked his lips before smiling,

“I can do that.”

Ben closed the distance between their lips with a tentative brush of his against hers, feeling her reaction, which was to go absolutely still, and then he reached around to put his arm across her shoulders, pulling her flush to him.

His other hand moved up to stroke her face, cupping her cheek, as he deepened the kiss, feeling her lips slowly part under his, and he heard her moan.

He hadn’t noticed when exactly the towel fell off, but he felt her body stiffen under his touch, and that was when his eyes opened, and she shrieked.

“FUCK!”

*

Rey felt her cheeks burst into flame, and she ducked down to retrieve her towel, realizing far too late how close it brought her to Ben’s crotch, and the fact she’d imagined she felt him grinding something against her after a moment of the kiss became cold truth.

She gulped, and stood back up as fast as humanly possible, gripping the towel until her fingers ached.

“No, that comes later.”

Ben quipped, ignoring her obvious embarrassment, which only served to make her feel more ashamed.

“I shouldn’t have done that.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

Rey frowned up at him.

“Bullshit. You did that on purpose.”

Ben cocked a brow at her, before pouting, throwing her off completely,

“How did you know?”

“Uh…”

Her words failed her, and in that split second, Ben had moved lightening fast, picked her up, one hand under her legs, and an arm at her back, carrying her to the bed, dropping her swiftly onto the soft comforter, and shocking her beyond speechlessness.

“…”

“I figured I’d cut right to the chase. Rey, do you want to have sex, ever, during the weekend we are together? Or do I need to go take another shower, followed by a cold rinse?”

Her heart was thundering in her chest, and the roaring in her ears was not unlike the ocean waves she remembered so vividly from her first visit to the beach, age ten.

She’d been captivated, hypnotized by the constant rolling blue and the warmth of the sun making the sand glitter like thousands of diamonds.

She’d never wanted to leave.

He was looming over her, but she could see how he was tensed, prepared to let up at any second, when she gave the word.

“No.”

She managed to croak out.

The fire in his eyes at once subsided to a simmer, and he began to move away,

“Okay.”

Her hand snapped out like a cobra strike, snagging his wrist and halting his movement, despite the fact he clearly outweighed her by almost double and his eyes found hers at once,

“No, I mean you don’t need to go.” She licked her lips, nerves almost paralyzing her, and so her hand was locked around him, not prepared to let him leave the bed.

“Oh.”

He shifted back over her, and she felt heat blossom in her chest, and drift southwards at once.

Breathing became difficult when his eyes darkened and dropped to stare at her exposed chest, heaving so often the towel was no doubt slipping.

“I want you.”

“Really?”

She could only nod, desire coursing through her, robbing her of rational thought and verbiage.

It had been many, many months since a man had looked at her like that, and even as a small voice in the back of her mind whispered it was all an act, a lie, an illusion, she couldn’t find it in her to care.

“Tell me to stop, if there’s anything you don’t want to do, or don’t like, okay?”

She nodded again, aching for him to _touch_ her again.

His hand was drifting up her thigh, and as his fingers drew close to her throbbing centre, she nearly cried out when he skipped past it to caress her stomach.

“So impatient.”

He hummed, nipping at her ear, and then placing kisses down her jawline to her neck, and sucking hard on a spot she was going to regret letting be marked in the morning.

“A bit.”

He was smiling against her skin, she could tell.

She didn’t notice when he tore away the towel, threw it halfway across the room, and how his hands moved around her so quickly and maddeningly slow all at once, it was only when a cold brush of air from his body shifting atop hers made her shiver that she realized she was naked.

“This is a bad idea.”

She mumbled, as he was kissing and sucking spots just shy of her tingling nipples and aching breasts.

“Always.”

He answered back, hands gently pressing her thighs apart, as he settled between them.

That simple fact went out the window when his lips first met her clit.

His tongue had not been overly invading during their kiss, and now, she decided she wasn’t going to complain if it ever was, for what he could do with it was suddenly worth every damn penny.

*

Ben was in awe.

Of Rey, of his luck, of lots of things.

Their first night, he’d never dreamt he’d be so lucky as to get to see her naked, and then have the pleasure of going down on her.

He’d pictured them pretending to be a couple for at least another day, driving her crazy with his teasing and little nudges here and there, riling her up until she all but begged him to fuck her.

From what he could feel, she was enjoying it, but she was also shockingly quiet.

Heavy breathing and occasional grinding up against him was always a good sign, but he could have died for a word or two of encouragement.

It was utterly unsexy to direct someone, but he craved it.

He stopped, and smirked to himself at the whine that escaped her throat.

There. That was something at least.

He placed a quick kiss on one of her thighs, and looked up at her,

“Everything okay?”

Rey seemed to be catching her breath, and her hands were fluttering around like escaped butterflies.

“Oh yeah. I mean, you’re like…wow. I wasn’t expecting…”

Every time.

It broke his heart a little to hear that phrase, that thought, those words, from _any_ woman he’d ever been with.

As if it was something that they didn’t deserve.

She’d been on her knees before him, even if accidentally, but he wouldn’t have dreamed of shoving her down and pointing her in the obvious direction.

It just wasn’t done.

But apparently the exact same thing was expected, in reverse.

He was supposed to never let the thought cross his mind. Let her wish for it.

Fuck that.

She tasted exquisite and he’d gladly take his time on her, but she was acting a little bit antsy, as if he’d done something wrong.

“Hm?”

She looked down at him, in the direction of his boxers, and he could have pretended otherwise, but he was utterly aroused by her, and it wasn’t because he had to be.

He knew if he’d met her any other way, crossed paths with her in an everyday moment, he would have been unable to stop himself from taking a second look.

The fact she was something so rare like this, naked, in bed, and yet still shy, was breathtaking. She had no idea how alluring she was.

He needed to be careful.

He was no longer flirting with danger, skirting the edge of emotion, he was on a razor’s edge, and he could easily hurt himself as well as her.

“I think I just want to keep things separate for now…you know?”

Bumping the brakes. That was a defensive tactic, and he’d done it enough to see it for what it was.

She was nervous as hell, despite how open things were, or should be, and she wanted to stop without saying stop.

His hand shot out, grasping at the covers and pulling them up and over her, and him by default, letting her curl up on her side, away from him but still close.

He was struck with the sudden instinct to protect her as best he could, and yet he didn’t want to crowd, to push, or in any way make her uncomfortable. He was there for her, but he wasn’t _there_ for her.

“Goodnight.”

He heard her whisper, and he gritted his teeth, fighting as hard as he could against the wave of pain, of _feeling_ , that that single word tried to inflict upon him.

Hours later, when she moved, and reached out for him in her sleep, he was wide awake, and finally relaxed, letting her hold him, as the dawn’s light began to creep in the windows.

The wedding was that day. She had to wear some fancy dress that would probably be twice as gorgeous as the sexy thing she’d worn the night before.

He was going to look like death.

He was so fucked.

*

Rey awoke to find herself utterly draped over Ben, and she froze instantly, before seeing that he was still asleep, his chest slowly rising and falling with his breathing, and she was struck by how young he looked like that.

She knew he was a good ten years older than her, but it only ever showed when he was conscious and expressive. His eyes too, they’d clearly seen a bit more than her, and she wondered if he would mind being asked about his personal life, his family, his past.

She was paying him for his company, that included real conversations…didn’t it?

Lost in thought, she felt rather than saw him wake up, and that included an almost on the verge of adorable way of stretching, freely, his long limbs completely unfolding and reaching, until he noticed her, and he shrunk back in on himself.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

She felt strangely awkward about the night before, even though not much had happened. She also felt enormously guilty for neglecting him.

Even though, she was paying him for his skills and attention, she still felt the tug, the urge, to return the favor. She’d been nearly blindsided with need for him, and then it had ebbed away, like a wave returning to the ocean.

She wasn’t sure why, except she did know.

The little voice.

The one that _just wouldn’t let it alone._

It was not going anywhere.

Having sex with a guy like him couldn’t end well.

Rey was not a person who could do one night stands.

She just couldn’t.

She was either attached to a guy, or pretending not to be if she slept with him.

It always went one of two ways.

He fell hard, and she grew indifferent.

She fell hard, and he fell for someone else.

There was no middle ground, no feasible way to want to have someone, and be just as desired in return. It couldn’t happen.

That sort of thing was just in books she read when she needed cheering up, or in movies that she watched when she felt particularly inclined to self harm.

That wasn’t something she took lightly either.

To say that her social anxiety could be crippling was an understatement.

Finn and Poe had really been the only reason she’d managed to survive college. They’d been her rocks.

Now she was losing them to each other.

They’d found happiness and contentment and everything she’d wanted in each other, so why on earth couldn’t she?

That thought was one that frequently kept her up.

Except that night.

Her eyes suddenly stung as she felt the weight of the truth on her chest. She slept well, beside a man who was paid to like her, to want her, to just _be_ with her.

Alone she slept okay, but rarely.

There wasn’t enough money in the world to keep her accompanied while she slept to guarantee results.

A hand was stroking her forehead, and she jerked back to the present, finding Ben staring at her with what appeared like concern in his dark eyes.

“You all right? Kinda spaced out there for a second.”

Rey forced a cheery smile, and nodded against the pillow, fighting how much she liked the feeling of his hand, and the way he looked at her.

‘All a lie. Not real. Just pretend.’

“Of course. I’m just trying to think about what my folks will have made us for breakfast…if anything. We might need to go out and grab something, then come back to get ready.”

Ben nodded,

“Sounds good. Are you sure you’re going to have enough time? The wedding is at five right? Don’t you need hours to get ready?”

He was teasing.

From the way he’d looked at her last night, he didn’t seem to agree with his words implication at all.

“Oh yeah. Five hours. Sounds about right.”

She made the smile brighter, and her cheeks started to hurt.

Suddenly he was moving in, and kissing her.

“Mmmph.”

“Sorry. I just hate that.”

Rey frowned,

“What?”

Ben sighed, and rolled away from her, instantly making her cold, and yet her cheek burned where he’d been touching her.

“Your smile that isn’t real. I only know because you did the same thing when I asked you on the plane how you were feeling when you woke up. I don’t like it.”

Rey pursed her lips,

“Well, too bad. It’s just an automatic thing. Years of retail ingrained in me. Being told to smile by assholes on the street.”

Ben put a hand on his forehead,

“God. Please don’t guilt trip me. I know I’m on a clock, but like…no. You’re better than this.”

“Uh, pot, calling kettle. You’re black.”

He sat up at once, and shoved off the covers, striding for the bathroom,

“I’m not on the clock yet okay? Not until I’ve been up for at least an hour.”

The door slammed so hard it made her jaw ache.

No.  That was because she was gritting her teeth.

She didn’t like being called out. Neither did he. Good to know.


	3. Chapter 3

Getting dressed was a silent affair, mainly because Ben was in the shower, and Rey was left to her own devices. The dress she had gotten for the wedding itself was plain, black and white stripes, with lace around the neckline.

Breakfast was the most awkward meal of her life, with her parents asking the random questions parents do, and Rey fighting to cut and run, merely because the idea of going out for breakfast had become extremely extravagant when she checked her bank account that morning.

Sure, she could blow ten grand on the hot guy who was the perfect boyfriend, almost, but buying him a meal was just out of the question.

She knew it was stupid.

She heard the bathroom door open, and it was Ben’s turn to come out in just a towel, except he’d probably done it on purpose, trying to throw her off.

It worked.

“You okay? You were really quiet at breakfast. When you weren’t being interrogated.”

Rey suddenly decided looking right at him wasn’t an option. She stole glances out of the corner of her eye, as if he was a sun, a supernova, otherwise blinding head on.

Her hands were shaking over her makeup.

“I’m fine.”

The lie was one she used often.

Far too much.

There was the wedding, the reception, and then they were flying home to New York that night. The dream weekend was almost over, and like a handful of sand, it was slipping away from her.

“Hey.”

She braced her hands on the edges of the vanity, gripping it until they were still, and she squeezed her eyes shut, willing away the waves of anxiety that threatened to drag her under.

Warm, large and strong, Ben’s hands were on her shoulders,

“What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, still keeping her eyes closed. She didn’t want to see the look of pity she knew would be coloring his face.

“Nothing. I’m _fine._ ”

“Are you though?”

Yes.

The lie she clung to was desperate.

He was right up against her back, and she could feel the dampness of his freshly washed skin, and smell  his shampoo, vanilla and sharp tones of clove.

He wasn’t trying to be sexy, or comforting, but he was managing to pull off both, and it was too much. Her eyes stung, and even though she fought them off, the tears came.

Her eye makup would need to be redone.

She pulled her hands from the vanity and her head fell into them.

“I can’t do this.”

His touch left her, and she felt him move away.

Clearly female emotions scared off every man, no matter if they were paid to care or not.

Typical.

Then she felt the same strong hands on her legs, forcing her to turn in her chair, and the heat from his skin bled through the fabric of her dress, causing her to wrench her head up from her hands.

He was kneeling in front of her, his eyes steady and dark, focused on her. Something inscrutable was on his face, and he wasn’t teasing her or smiling. He was solemn.

“Rey, yes, you _can_. It’s just a wedding. It’s a social event that you will glide through. I’m here, I’ll be by your side. You need anything, you let me know.”

She smiled at him through her tears.

“How?”

He shrugged suddenly, mood lightening,

“Pinch me, grab my arm, whatever.”

Rey laughed shakily,

“No, I mean, how do you know I will get through this?”

His hands shifted, sliding up to cup her cheeks, holding her face so she couldn’t look away from him, and he wasn’t looking away from her. Thoughts of ruined mascara and bleeding lines of black on her skin flew away when he leaned in, his gaze dropping to her mouth, free of lipstick for the moment,

“You’re stronger than you think. I dig that.”

She smiled halfway, before his lips met hers in a searing kiss.

The worst part was, it felt real.

*

Ben normally would have shied away from the entire thing. Crying women were not his forte. When he first made his mother cry, he felt as if he’d been stabbed in the stomach. He ran away. When she came to get him, he could only apologize a thousand times, even if he didn’t mean it, he never wanted to make it happen again.

Now, he emerged from the longest and hottest shower on record, and found Rey on the verge of tears, sitting and putting her face paint on.

Well, that’s how he thought of it. He knew she thought she needed it for the special day, and maybe it did enhance her beauty, but in the end, lipstick made it harder to kiss her, eye stuff made her far too sexy for her own good, and the last thing he needed was competition.

What?

Where had that thought come from?

He’d gotten closer, and the raw pain and fear he’d seen on her face tore something apart inside of him. He’d been there, and he’d barely gotten through it, hardly surviving his first year on the streets.

Leaving home.

Throwing away his supposed bright future.

Turning to what he did now.

It shouldn’t have been so easy to bring back her smile, but it was.

Kissing her was completely unplanned.

But it felt so right.

The right thing to do.

Really, what he should have done was left, given her some of the money back, or hell, all of it, and walked away.

Instead, he stayed. Clad in just a towel, having thought he’d gotten out all his frustration in the shower, now kneeling before her and prepared to whatever it would take to make her feel better, he had visions of pulling up that dress and bending her over the bed, until she gasped out his name.

Oh.

That wasn’t a good idea.

But it sure sounded good to his raging hard on.

Fuck.

He broke the kiss and pulled back, seeing her with her eyes still closed and practically leaning into him, and that was it.

He stood up, shimmying his hips so the towel fell off, and he yanked her up to her feet, and her eyes snapped open.

“Forget about negotiations. This is an emergency.”

He heard the way her breath caught and saw her green eyes darken, so he knew he was on the right track.

Then he watched how her eyes dropped, taking him in, and he actually thought he got _harder_ from that.

“Okay.”

She sighed, and he nearly melted in relief.

It wasn’t too sudden or hurried, although they had a mere two hours until they needed to leave.

Ben carefully undid the clasps of her dress, and folded it before setting it aside, a far cry from how his fantasy had gone.

Of course she had pretty lingerie on underneath, and any other time, he would have relished taking it off and teasing her beyond what she could bear.

Now though was about her, making her feel better, feel confident, and walk into that fucking wedding with a glow.

He reached into his suitcase and plucked out the small pack of condoms he always brought with him, no matter what, and was stopped short by the look on her face.

It spoke of hunger and something raw.

“I want you. I’m fine. Never stopped taking it, even though it’s been forever.”

He got what she was saying, and he tossed the plastic wrapper aside without a word.

His hands made quick work of her bra and lacy scrap of something resembling underwear, and she was writhing and panting beneath him, breathless, and soaking wet.

He nearly lost his mind there.

“Ready?”

She just nodded, words having escaped her.

He couldn’t help smiling.

That was just how he worked.

Pushing inside her, inch by inch was the sweetest agony he’d ever known.

She was so tight, and scorching hot, all his skill and practice fell away in an instant.

 _‘Her, it’s all for her_.’

He reminded himself.

So he slowed down, and moved at the pace that most made her react, even if she was still fairly quiet.

Her hands were not idle, gripping his arms and sliding over his back, digging her short nails in until he was certain there was blood marring his skin.

He felt the fluttering of her muscles around him, deep inside her, and that was when he reached between them, were his flesh met hers, and pressed slow hard circles against her clit, and his reward was the feral scream ripped from her throat as she threw her head back, arching up against him when she came.

Beautiful wasn’t even close to how she looked in the throes of her orgasm.

When her eyes reopened, and they met his, that was when his control broke. A few frantic thrusts later, and he was groaning out his climax.

He pulled out of her and fell onto the bed beside her, wary of trying to put any weight on her, and when he felt her move close to him, he knew that she was a cuddler.

“Thank you.”

She whispered.

“Of course.”

He stroked her hair back from her forehead, and marveled at the lack of sweat.

He’d been flushed from the hot shower, and naturally, gotten heated.

But she was almost shivering.

“I need to redo my makeup.”

She mumbled.

“Probably.”

He was smiling. He couldn’t help it. He got smiley after sex, paid or not.

Oh.

That put a damper on things.

In that instant, he made the decision.

He wasn’t going to keep it.

He’d find a way to sneak it back into her suitcase, and then, he wouldn’t feel so guilty anymore…for _feeling_ in the first place.

It was the right thing to do.

*

Walking into the wedding and taking her seat, Rey was struck by how different she felt, after the hasty sex Ben had decided to instigate.

She hoped it wasn’t too obvious and she’d done her best to tame her ‘just been fucked’ hair. Three buns weren’t very wedding-y but they did the job, containing her wild waves.

Ben sat down beside her, and his hand automatically found hers, gently squeezing, as if to say, ‘Everything will be fine.’

Maybe it would be.

Rey smiled, despite the nerves that still screamed inside her, and sighed.

She could relax a bit now.

If just for the moment.

The music cued, and everyone turned to look, watching as Finn strode down the aisle, a bouquet of white lilies clutched in hand, Poe’s favorite flower, and Rey swore her eyes were about to sting again.

Ben held her hand tighter, and she turned to smile at him.

It was too bad he hadn’t been a real guy she’d met and knew. She would have been happy to introduce him to Finn, he was almost family, and they would have been good friends, she was sure of it.

At the reception, there was a minimal amount of dancing, led by Finn and Poe of course, now, Mr. and Mr. Dameron.

Rey watched, somewhat amused from the sidelines, sipping on her glass of champagne.

“Rey?”

Ben spoke up, her name like a prayer in his voice, and she looked over at him, attempting fond detachment. It didn’t work.

“Hmm?”

“May I have this dance?”

He had to be joking.

“What?”

He jerked his head at the dance floor, sending a few dark curls shifting over his forehead,

“Dance with me?”

It could be the last time he took her in his arms, so why was she hesitating?

“Okay.”

She set her glass down and moved to take his hand, letting him pull her close, and as he began to step carefully to the music, she found herself blinking back tears.

“Are you having a good time?”

“Yes. It was a beautiful ceremony.”

“That’s true.”

She set her head down against his shoulder and focused on breathing deeply and slowly, ignoring the burning ache in her chest.

The song ended, and another began, but Ben didn’t stop, or let go of her, so they continued to dance. Time ticked by, until Rey woke as if from a dream, slumped over a table, having somehow drifted off from the exertion and champagne.

Her parents tried to protest, insisting she could stay another night, but the plane tickets in her pocket would not be refunded.

They had no idea how much money she’d blown on this weekend.

“I’ll be back for Christmas, if you pay my way.”

She kissed her mother’s cheek, and hugged her father, while Ben hung back, carrying both suitcases, and looking slightly lost.

The airport was surprisingly busy for ten o clock at night, and on a Sunday too. Rey collapsed in her seat with silent despair washing over her, and Ben followed her with a huffed sigh.

“That was…fun.” He said. She snorted.

“Oh yeah.”

Her sarcasm was strong.

“Don’t be afraid to fall asleep on me.”

He grinned down at her, and she knew she was blushing.

That had been a complete accident.

“Okay.”

*

Five weeks passed without incident, and Ben went through nearly twice as many women, each one more complicated and equally repelling.

Some were much older, some were ugly, some were just lonely.

It wasn’t until his last client, a stunning woman with dark skin and blue eyes, that he realized he was avoiding Rey.

“You know, if you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people.”

He had smiled and let her stroke his forehead, brushing his hair back from his eyes.

“And who do you see in mine?”

“I see a man who is on the run. From many things. From family, who hurt you, from love, which you think is impossible. From your very being. You wish to escape your own skin. It cannot be done Ben. You need to stand, and face the truth. Face your truth.”

She’d left him in turmoil, and his hands had twitched automatically towards his phone, and the last call he’d made.

It had been to confirm which gate he was meeting Rey at, in the airport.

He’d shied away from texting or calling her, not wishing to bother her, or remind her just what she’d done. Had to do.

Resorted to hiring him.

He somehow got it in his head that she felt ashamed. According to his last client, he was lying to himself.

His thumb brushed over the phone icon, and it was ringing.

There was no going back.

“Hello?”

Her voice, clear as a bell, answered promptly, and he nearly dropped the phone.

“Rey?”

“Yes? Who’s this?”

He gulped. She’d already forgotten his voice, and maybe the entire thing was a horrible idea, rehashing what they’d been.

“Ben.”

“Oh.”

It wasn’t a disappointed sound, more like a surprised one. It still threw him off.

“How’ve you been?”

“Busy with work…you?”

“Same here.”

He imagined her mind was jumping to the conclusion that no matter what she did, there was little chance their work was anywhere the same type of busy.

“You been taking care of yourself?”

It was a strange question. He was in the habit of taking care of himself, yes.

He was all he had.

Well…he might have had her, if things had been different.

“Yeah.”

His throat felt dry.

“Should you be calling me? Are you allowed to make contact with old…customers?”

The way she said the word hurt him. Like it was something disgusting.

“Of course. I don’t work for a madam Rey. I’m my own boss.”

If her mindset hadn’t been annoying, it might have been amusing.

She clearly didn’t understand how it worked.

“Right. Sorry. So what’s up?”

Ben’s throat closed up.

What was up?

Why was he calling?

He knew why. He just didn’t know if he had the strength to ask her, and risk being turned down.

Would she take him for who he was?

Would she want to spend time with him?

“I, uh,”

“Hm?”

She was very attentive.

He wondered if she suspected…no, she couldn’t possibly.

She’d thought him play acting, and he’d probably done too good a job if she still believed it.

“Do you want to get a drink sometime?”

There. It was out in the open.

Silence reigned over the other end of the line for the longest few seconds of Ben’s life.

“Okay. If you want.”

“Of course. I miss seeing you.”

Rey sounded confused,

“But you were just with me for a weekend… I’m not that special.”

If he could slap her with sense, and love, he would.

“You did not just say that.”

“Uh…”

“Rey, I don’t know how to tell you this, but the sex, that was against my better judgment, and all because I wanted you. I don’t think you understand.”

“I thought that was just to stop me crying…or whatever.”

Ben’s head fell into his hands.

“Rey…that may have been a side effect, but is far from the original intent.”

“Oh.”

Another sound, that sounded like pleasant shock. She wasn’t used to people actually caring about her, or for her. Or maybe just men.

“I think you’ll understand when we meet. I’ll even get the first two or three rounds.”

He could hear the smile in her voice now.

“Okay. I found the envelope. You know, the money. Are you sure you can afford a round of drinks?”

Ben’s head fell into his hands.

“Yeah. I couldn’t take it. It didn’t feel right.”

“I almost didn’t believe it. You were telling the truth.”

“Of course. I felt…something for you. Still do. So, when can you meet?”

It was nearly midnight now, and he imagined her flipping through her calendar, finding that perfect time in her upcoming week.

“Tomorrow.”

He blinked in surprise. So soon?

“Are you sure?”

“Are you free?”

For her, he was free any day, any time.

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Imperial Java?”

He asked, and she laughed.

“What is that?”

“Oh it’s this indie coffee shop off of First and Seventh.”

“Okay.”

It should have been annoying, but her one little word that packed so much emotion in reply, was actually kind of endearing.

“Okay.”

She laughed again.

“Goodnight Ben. Thanks for calling.”

“You’re welcome. Goodnight.”

He hung up, and couldn’t feel his face, he was smiling so wide.

*

Coffee dates weren’t Rey’s usual forte, but then again she wasn’t a big drinker either. It worked out perfectly, she got off work at 2, and by the time she was walking into the café, it was just half past.

Ben wasn’t there yet, so she ordered her usual, black with three sugars, and took a seat in the corner, prepared to keep a lookout for him.

He didn’t keep her waiting long. He swept in, with the brisk fall breeze at his back, long coat billowing and dark curls fluttering.

She’d almost forgotten how handsome he was in the nearly two months since she’d seen him.

He smiled at her, and she swore her knees wobbled a bit. Good thing she was already sitting down. But then her name was called for her coffee, and she had to get up.

“Stop. I’ll get it.”

He held out his hand to her, and she froze, legs shaking as she held still, and then collapsed back into her seat.

“Okay.”

She didn’t hear him order anything, but he appeared at her table with her drink in one hand, and a glass bottled drink in the other. It was chocolate milk.

“That’s all you are having?”

She eyed it skeptically, and he smiled again,

“It’s my indulgence of choice. Don’t judge me too harshly.”

“Of course not…but do you not like coffee?”

He shrugged, and took a generous sip of his milk,

“It’s okay. But I’d much rather keep my caffeine addiction to a minimum. One cup a day is good enough for me.”

She gulped down a sip of her burning hot coffee, and winced.

“This is my, fourth, I think. Is that bad?”

Ben reached over to stroke a long finger across the back of her hand, distracting her and drawing her eye,

“Only if you don’t plan to be up all night.”

“Oh.”

That was rather straight to the point, and less of the ‘let’s catch up’ and more of the ‘I know what I want.’

She’d been thinking about kissing him goodbye after their reunion date, but now he’d opened a whole other bag of cats.

Maybe they wouldn’t have to say goodbye so early after all.

She smiled to herself, and took another sip of her coffee.

***

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> final chapter! <3


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